Nervous

i don't know why i am afraid to go
i'm not sure why i'm afraid to be alone
why is it, this gathering i dread
to get together & mourn the dead?
why are emotions so uncomfortable?
why do they make us anxious, unstable?
is this what it is to be real
to fear, to dread, & just to feel?
motions so overwhelming
trials so exasperating
you'll never feel prepared
i'll always feel scared
to face these things head on
this life we dwell upon.